Surviving a Shounen Manga

I did think it was an odd name.

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「Cafeteria before a Bizarre Adventure」

Of course, it’s nothing particularly strange considering the manga that is this world’s background.
In fact, I remember many shops with similarly strange names, such as ‘Pub of Exhausted Chasers after a Smelly Bigfoot’ and ‘One Night with a Corpse’.

Still, it was a name that did not suit this city which had a fairly developed civilization.
Because this wasn’t an area with a strong smell of adventure.

So, I carried with me some doubts when I entered.
I wondered how the hell this place got its name, and how come a cafe rather than a bar became the base of this organization?

As I went down the stairs and glanced around, I was able to solve some of my doubts.

First of all, the place was larger and more complex than I’d thought.

Numerous brightly coloured rooms were spread out, and the passages stretched like a maze between them.
If I had gone in from the front instead of coming down from above, I probably would have lost my way.

It was bizarre.

The word ‘cafeteria’ didn’t quite fit the identity of this space.

This place was instead reminiscent of a red-light district, except with all noise removed.
Under the dim background lighting, the colourful lights emanating from the rooms gave the scenery a rather hazy feeling.
Of course, there were no traces of women either.

‘I think I’ve seen similar places…’

I thought it was a familiar atmosphere, but I couldn’t remember anything clearly.

But, well, it would have been weirder if it weren’t familiar.
This place must also be just a rough-hewn setting piece that had never been actually drawn by the artist.

By the way,

‘… There are too many rooms.’

I’d anticipated difficulties from the start.

By making a fuss at the entrance, I made many of the gang members rush out, but it was foolish to assume that had been all of them.
There must have been people scattered all over the place, but with so many rooms, it was impossible to know where exactly they were staying.

And it wasn’t just that.

What about the kid’s position? It would be nice if she was with the other gang members, but what if not? It was too much of a risk to open these many doors one by one and look for her.

‘What’s that?’

It was then –

“… That’s!”

An angry shout somewhere.

‘Huh? Wait a moment…’

It was a voice filled with anguish.

Also, the voice sounded much too young.

“… I’m leaving!”

As I listened closely, the voice sounded quite familiar to me.

Suddenly, without realizing it, the corners of my lips curved up.

It’s that kid.

As if possessed, I walked towards the direction the voice came from.

After a while,

“Bullshit!”

I was able to pinpoint the location of the target.

A red room, luxuriously decorated, about 10m to my front.
There were people inside.

I approached the room and peeked in carefully.

Except for the little kid inside and the person he was talking to, there was no other sign of life that I could feel.

It was a much better situation than imagined.
If you just beat one guy, you can have a solo session with the kid you’ve been searching for, right away.

However, I was not in a hurry to move.
Because there was one thing that bothered me.

The limit of this invisibility.

Limitation: You cannot make anyone other than yourself invisible.

Even if I pick up the little kid and hide her in my arms, her body won’t become invisible.
It’ll just appear to be floating in the air.
Meaning, it wouldn’t be so easy to secretly kidnap the kid.

Hmmm.

I checked the time I had remaining.
I’d spent about 8 minutes so far.
There was still about 20 minutes left.

‘Let’s think about it.’

Then, as I was thinking hard, the conversation from inside the room naturally flowed into my ears.

The little kid was talking to a man with a soft voice.

“I paid off all my debt.”

“Hey, do you even know how much it was?”

“I should be free now.”

“I’m sorry.
You cannot leave the organization until you pay off all your debt.”

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‘Debt, freedom…’

Even though I didn’t particularly need to pay attention to the conversation, I still listened to the details without realizing it.

“I paid it all off.”

“You still have a long way to go.”

“Why? I’m sure the others’ debts… “

“Because you aren’t like them.”

“… Nobody said anything about this.”

“They did.
I guess you didn’t read the contract carefully.”

“…”

As I listened to the conversation, I couldn’t hide my growing bewilderment.

‘What? What’s this ultra-cliché plotline?’

To simply sum up the conversation between the two –

The kid owed the organization a debt, and worked as their servant for several years to pay it off.
She made a lot of money in the meantime and thought she had already paid it all off, but now the organization was insisting that she was still indebted, so as to not let her go.

‘Who is that little kid, really?’

Of course, the exact story was unknown.
It was just a rough guess based on a part of the conversation without knowing the beginning or the end.

But nevertheless, I was convinced.

This is a cliché.
And this is a character that should play a very important role.

People with stories like this usually emerge as key supporting actors.
After meeting the main character and being saved, they become a friend of the protagonist and show off their ‘extraordinary ability’, which is the reason why the organization refused to let them go.
A cliché taken to its perfect conclusion.

But the problem is,

‘When I think of the manga, I don’t remember seeing her at all…’

This kid is not part of the manga character cast.

She did not appear even though she had special abilities, unique looks, unusual behaviour, and even a tragic backstory.

Why?

There was only one reason I could think of.

That little kid was indeed planned as a character, but she was unfortunate enough that her appearance was cancelled.

My thoughts had become very complicated.

Is there any way I can use this kid?

As much as ‘unrecovered rice cakes’, ‘non-appearing characters’ must also be a subject of deep regret for the author.

What if I could solve this?

‘Can I make this work?’

Of course, there are too many problems right now.
I can’t even take care of myself; how can I bring another character to the stage?

But clearly, there’s plenty of room for manoeuvring.

One more reason to take the little kid.

I checked the time again.

The elapsed time so far was 15 minutes.

It was confirmed that the little boy had animosity towards this organization, so it didn’t look like my job would be too difficult.

First, knock down the guy she’s talking to, then tell the kid that you’re going to help her, roughly convince her somehow, and then take a sack of money and bounce, with her in tow.

‘Okay, easy peasey.’

Then, just as I was about to open the door –

“Hey, wait outside for a minute.”

An unexpected voice was heard.
The soft voice of the man had become dry and rough.

I was perplexed.

Of course, it wasn’t because of the changed texture of the voice.
Rather, it was because of the contents.

Wait?

I hurriedly looked around.
No one was nearby.
Just me.

‘… No, no way.’

I held my breath and observed the situation.

Nonsense.
I almost believed I’d been caught.

However, before the poundings of my heart had completely subsided, that voice flew out again.

“We’re still talking.
Yeah, just wait a little bit longer like that.
I’ll go out soon and get rid of you.
Little mouse.”

“Out? Who’s there?”

… So.

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At that moment, I knew it in my gut.

That guy is referring to me.
Something is definitely wrong.
Money isn’t the issue anymore.
I must run away immediately.
Otherwise…

‘It could be dangerous.’

So, it was time to turn right back, and fast.

However, suddenly, dozens of pieces of cutlery smashed through the door and flew out at me.

“Yikes!”

One of the forks barely passed me by, brushing my cheek.

If I hadn’t thrown myself away just in time, my forehead would have been sporting a hole right now.

“I didn’t tell you to run, though.”

“…”

Soon after, a man stepped out the door.

A red cloak, and a bald head.

Seeing his appearance, my mind went blank for a moment.

“What is this… Invisibility? Seriously, cut that damn shit out.
Let me see your face while we have a nice chat.
If you don’t want to be revealed to the world already in shreds, that is.”

It was a face I had seen before.

That too, in a picture, and not too long ago.

Around the 50th volume, there is an episode where ten adventurer groups clash with each other to win the position of the Adventure King.
Title, ‘Scramble for the Throne at Mount Knock’.
It must have been this guy I saw then.

I don’t know exactly which group he belonged to, but one thing is certain.

None of the guys belonging to those ten adventurer groups were weak.

It’s not an exaggeration to say that each of them had enough strength to raze this city to the ground given half a day.

Even if it’s somebody at the tail end of strength among them.

“Huh? Not going to show yourself? I’m not lying, you know?”

Saying that, he instantly radiated some kind of intangible power.

Psss –.

“Ka – haa.”

I couldn’t even figure out what happened to me.

Before I could even stand up, he approached me with quick steps.

“Well, it must be an ugly face, but let’s at least check it out.
Right? Wouldn’t it be better if you could leave us cleanly and neatly?”

I felt my body tremble.

My legs and arms were shaking non-stop, and I couldn’t even control my own body.

“Hu…”

It wasn’t because of the impending sense of death.
This was an effect naturally imposed on a character who has felt the difference in ‘class’.

For example, the moment the extra villains see the main character’s unique ability, it’s like they can only keep trembling and are unable to move.

‘Or maybe I’m just scared and making excuses.’

I stopped thinking about it any further, and immediately removed the invisibility.

Well, not like I had a choice.

Then the man chuckled and pointed at my face.

“Look at this, it’s ugly alright.
You really were better off invisible.”

“… It’s unfair to die like this, so I’m just going to say a word.”

“One word?”

It was then –

“… Huh? Squatjaw?”

The little kid recognized me and spoke in amazement.

“Hey, you know her?”

The man snorted as if he got interested.

It was fortunate.
It looked like this could last some time.

“It’s a bit embarrassing to say.
Why do you think I sneaked in here?”

The man was silent for a moment at my words, then shrugged his shoulders.

“Well, I don’t know?”

And then –

“He’s a stupid bank robber.
With an awful crooked chin.”

The little kid responded instead.

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It was a cheap enough jab to make me forget the sad story I’d heard a while ago.

“Aha, I guess you came for this kid.
But how did you know about this place?”

“Can I go and tell her directly? About how hard I had to work to reach here, and how unfair I feel now?”

“Why?”

“Because I wasted a lot of money because of her, and now I feel like I’m going to lose my life.
I want to hit her once, face-to-face.”

The man grinned and then shook his head.

“Impossible.
No matter how you look at it, she’s our organization’s treasure.
How can I let her get hurt?”

At that time –

“It’s okay, tell him to come.
That Squatjaw isn’t a big deal.”

The little kid said in an indifferent tone.

Then, to my surprise, the man nodded his head.

“Ummm… well.
Yeah, go have a chat.
I don’t think it’s going to solve anything, though.”

Soon after, as if the man had released his energy, the tremors throughout my body gradually subsided.

I passed the man who chuckled at me, trudging towards the little kid.

When I got closer, I saw a somewhat unexpected expression on the kid’s face.

A mixture of tension, nervousness and bewilderment.
And amongst all that, a single teardrop.

She looked really sorry for me.

“Little kid.”

“… How did you come here? How are you going…”

“How did you steal the money?”

“What?”

“That leather pouch is one great ability.
Is all the money still in there?”

“… Idiot Squatjaw.
Does that matter right now?”

“It matters.
More to you than to me.
Yes, or no? Talk quickly.”

The little kid looked at me, puzzled, but then nodded her head.

“… It’s still there.”

Then,

“Hey, hey! You can’t take that money with you when you die anyway.
Stop messing around and tell me how you found this place.”

The man shouted.

But I ignored it and asked the little boy again.

“Okay, if I save you, will you give me that? Don’t cheat this time.”

“… What?”

“No! What are you talking about now?”

The man began to approach.

There was no time.

I quickly reached out to the little boy.

“You promised.
If you understand, take my hand.”

“What are you saying…”

The little kid was puzzled, but she reached out to me.

“Haha, what kind of prank are these guys playing now.”

Then, just as the man arrived, I touched the hologram window I had turned on a while ago.

Following,

Please tell us where you are going.
Currently, there are a total of five chapters that are open for movement.

I muttered very softly.

“… To Goldam City.”

The little kid’s name was Cocoa.

She was a girl, nine years old, from the far north of Northland.

And she was a lot more brazen than I’d thought.

“I was originally going to pay you back.”

“Yeah, right.”

“Looking at it, doesn’t look like it was properly split.
You must’ve stolen some of it.”

“…”

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“Pot, kettle[1].”

“… That’s ridiculous.”

I could only sniff at her impetuosity.

“But… that curse potion.
Was that a fake?”

“Yup.”

“Yes, yes, of course.
Stupid of me to ask.”

Hmmm.
Still, it’d seemed so real.
The smoke that rose…

Then, I looked at the kid next to me and thought. 

It’s already water under the bridge, anyway.

Rescuing this girl created an unexpected danger.
It was quite threatening.

Of course, it wasn’t possible to ascertain just from the existence of that bald head whether that organization was one of the ten adventurer groups involved in ‘Scramble for the Throne at Mount Knock’.
That said, the gang members guarding the entrance were too weak if you looked at that scale.

However, it was true that the bald head alone was enough to be a threat.
If he started to single-mindedly pursue us… we were going to end up quite tired.

And on top of that –

“What’s the organization called? Don’t know.”

“Then what’s the chief’s name?”

“Don’t know.
That guy’s the only one I know.”

Cocoa also had no proper idea about the identity of the organization.
This meant that even with the knowledge I had, I couldn’t prepare for them properly.
I didn’t know where they were or what they were doing.

Hmmm.

Well, it wasn’t enough to sigh like the heavens were collapsing right away.
Because, frankly, I didn’t have to worry too much about it while inside a chapter.
The ‘preceding plot’ created by the artist will prevent the appearance of third parties as much as possible.
Wouldn’t the risk of an attack be significantly reduced if you keep hovering around the main character?

At that time, maybe because she’d been conscious of my gaze, Cocoa asked.

“What are you thinking about?”

“You don’t need to know.”

“Tell me anyway.
Because Squatjaw is stupid, and I need someone to talk to.”

“…”

Anyway, it’s true that there is a risk factor, but there are naturally also positive factors in being with this kid.

First reason, you can turn her into a real character and buy the author’s favourability.

Of course, this is just a guess.
Anyway, there must be a reason why this little kid couldn’t be made into a proper character.
If you try to clumsily overcome that obstacle without understanding the behind-the-scenes reasoning, you may end up conflicting with the author’s ideas.
That would only invite his wrath.

Rather, the second reason was even more valuable to me than this.

Second reason, this girl by herself is just incredibly versatile.

“Just how big is your leather bag?”

“I never measured it, so I don’t know.”

“Do you have more room?”

“Why? Do you want to put a building in it or something?”

“…”

What I thought was a special ability.

It was, surprisingly, the ‘unique ability’ of this girl.

[Leather Bag of Holding].

In fact, in a way, it was normal.
Wasn’t she a proto-character that even had a clichéd backstory? Although she didn’t appear in the actual work, this little girl’s character settings weren’t going anywhere.

It wasn’t just this.
Despite being a kid, she had tremendous strength, and she even did all the work by herself during the bank job.

‘Heh, kid.
You’re going to be worked to death.’

Cocoa looked at me strangely as I giggled.

“But what are you going to do now?”

“What do you mean, naturally we have to do what we are good at.”

“What are we good at?”

I pointed to a building in the distance.

[Standard Adventure Commercial Bank – Goldam City Branch]

“I used up all my money to save you.”

Now I’ll just have to do a job again.

Editor’s Notes:

[1] 쌤쌤 (phonetically, same same) meaning being the same.
Translating as pot, kettle from the context.

Yes, literally everybody saw the sidekick part coming.
No shipping discussions though, please.
First, she’s a kid.
Second, you’re just as likely to find romance in this story as in the manga it’s parodying.